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Theory of Depression
after a prolonged war with life,
for the first few moments,
we become sullen and then lonely,
until our spirits become pale and void.
the light departs our soul and living becomes
as purulent and desolate as a necrotic wound.
the theory of depression is dark.
i do not know why. nobody knows why.
even the mystics and clerisies do not.
even the dull and the ignorant do not.
the secrets seem to be earthed deep
within the crypts of our impalpable psyches,
striving to see the light of life. so to stay cool, we get
drunk to drown the pain or smoke pipes to vaporize
the demons or crack jokes to make others laugh
while our souls rot
the demands of depression are oppressive
it breathes on our necks, expiring hot hate.
you either hear the gun telling you to pull
the trigger or the rope asking you to swing from
its noose or the sea enticing you to take a
deep dive down the blue aisle or the voice of gravity
pleading with you to jump down from the window
of the eighth floor of a skyscraper.
we must not blame those that kill themselves.
the soul wants to be free at all cost.
but we also must not listen to death.
it offers uncertainties and assumptions
for the dead and the dying.
no one is living. we all are dying or trying
hard to escape from a groupthink that oppresses
people for being inadequate; for being… different.
About the author
Pat Ashinze is an hybrid of two major Nigerian tribes: Igbo and Yoruba.
He is fluid in his writings, creating poetry and prose within the axial stream of metaphors and aphorisms.
His works have appeared and are forthcoming on The Pangolin Review, Kalahari review, Blognostics, Merak Mag, Dissident Voice, Vox Poetica, Writers Newsletter, Tuck Magazine, I am Not a Silent Poet and elsewhere.
Currently, he is pursuing a degree in Medicine at The University of Ilorin, Kwara State, Nigeria.
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